And...we are back in action!
I forget how cathartic blogging can be. Even when you don't write much, the process of thinking about your life and attempting to put words to those thoughts is good. It is all in the attempt - as so many things are in life. It is the process, the development, the struggle that inspires us, unites us and eventually makes us. Idealizing what could be is never as liberating as experiencing what is. And this is the heavy truth that I have often failed to realize. My life is an open book in which I just have to turn the page. Why is lifting that finger and lifting your hand so hard? Or is it even hard? What is holding me back? NOTHING. A new page, a new start!
Spring quarter has begun and is in full swing. It is absolutely amazing to have sadie and kels as roommates - and to think the house is all ours! (Betsy moved out.) Already, Sadie and I have been making big plans for the quarter including a workout regime and an insane social life. THIS is what I was missing. The motivation and the fast pace of the real world gets me going. I now know that I am at my best when I am busy and exited about my commitments.
Working at University Catering is great - decent money and good people. Flexible schedule, too. I just quit Graeters today via email (Bun, I started working there right before spring break in order to rake in the moolah - it turns out it wasn't worth it as the work is labor-intensive and the people are creeps) I love my classes minus 2 - okay i love 2 of my classes (they are history, figures...) Sades and I worked out yesterday - feels good feels right. Notice how I did not say today - we both slept in! Whatever, sleep is important too!
Bottom line: NO EXCUSES. the only one I am cheating is myself. LIVE LIFE. PERIOD. you are already living it, why not experience it fully?
I hope your program is tip top - have you started a countdown to Europe yet?! If you haven't, I will for you! 54 MORE DAYS!
I'm there with you. You're here with me.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Sunday, February 15, 2009
The Dumbing Down of Love...
Sunday morning...
yesterday was Valentine's Day. Em came over for a bit in the afternoon. Kels went on a date with Evan. and she left M&Ms for me! I was really surprised - made me smile :) It was nice staying home watching chick flicks all night with my champagne (what better way to celebrate one's single hood) Ryan came over (probably from pity of me being alone) for a few hours then he went to work. It was uneventful but nice.
Friday, I went in for a quick interview at University Catering (where Kelsey, Emily, Gracie, and at one time - Betsy works) I think I was hired - they said they would email me to come in to work on the paperwork when the guy was in. I will give them until Tuesday to get on that.
This post mainly serves as my desperate attempt to procrastinate from all my writing assignments I HAVE to complete by tonight. This includes both of my personal statements for study abroad applications - it is so hard for me to write about myself and my interests - I have putting it off for two weeks. I also have a book report and a paper to write - I'll get to it.
My dad's birthday is next next week (25th - Ash Wednesday). I'm going home for the weekend for a doctor's appt. and for his birthday dinner. I really need to go home - to refocus, relax and be with my family - it is getting harder and harder for me each day. I find myself drifting away often and it scares me. this feeling just needs to go away.
Goals for today/this week:
#1 submit study abroad applications
#2 book report/paper/research
#3 clear my mind
Have a good day! I love you!
yesterday was Valentine's Day. Em came over for a bit in the afternoon. Kels went on a date with Evan. and she left M&Ms for me! I was really surprised - made me smile :) It was nice staying home watching chick flicks all night with my champagne (what better way to celebrate one's single hood) Ryan came over (probably from pity of me being alone) for a few hours then he went to work. It was uneventful but nice.
Friday, I went in for a quick interview at University Catering (where Kelsey, Emily, Gracie, and at one time - Betsy works) I think I was hired - they said they would email me to come in to work on the paperwork when the guy was in. I will give them until Tuesday to get on that.
This post mainly serves as my desperate attempt to procrastinate from all my writing assignments I HAVE to complete by tonight. This includes both of my personal statements for study abroad applications - it is so hard for me to write about myself and my interests - I have putting it off for two weeks. I also have a book report and a paper to write - I'll get to it.
My dad's birthday is next next week (25th - Ash Wednesday). I'm going home for the weekend for a doctor's appt. and for his birthday dinner. I really need to go home - to refocus, relax and be with my family - it is getting harder and harder for me each day. I find myself drifting away often and it scares me. this feeling just needs to go away.
Goals for today/this week:
#1 submit study abroad applications
#2 book report/paper/research
#3 clear my mind
Have a good day! I love you!
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Pieces of What...
I just decided that I will test myself. I will do Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred in 30 days straight. Am I capable of such a commitment? Do I have the will to see it through? Stay tuned....
For the record, the last four times I tried this, I gave up on the 2nd day...
This time is different. I can feel it.
I also will be working towards applying to three internships within the week - Wish me luck!
Have a good day, bun! How's your juice diet coming?
For the record, the last four times I tried this, I gave up on the 2nd day...
This time is different. I can feel it.
I also will be working towards applying to three internships within the week - Wish me luck!
Have a good day, bun! How's your juice diet coming?
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Shiver
It's been a while since my last post. Happy February 1!
It is absolutely insane how fast January went - and it's crazy that we are in the 5th week of the quarter - MIDPOINT.
It's always good to self examine in the middle of things so that's what I have been doing this weekend. My parents came up yesterday to spend the day with me - I had been anxiously waiting for their visit ever since they told me - for a week and a half. My parents visiting me is a big deal. Not only do I absolutely love spending time with them - It means so much more that they take the effort to drive up early and leave late. It's nice to relax with them away from our usual home atmosphere. Yesterday was especially nice. We went to North Market (Columbus' indoor Findlay market) and we ate Sarefino's calzones. My dad was like a little boy in a candy shop when he realized they sold Cream Soda - he kept calling it Cream Cheese. My mom, being the resourceful considerate woman that she is, snuck off while we ordered and bought us a chocolate croissant for dessert - it was a very nice gesture. Splitting the croissant got all three of us reminiscing about our past European travels...
We walked around the market enmeshed with cheerleaders, Christian youth group members and Anime die-hards (all three had conventions going on). We stopped by Jenni's icecream for another treat where I got black coffee and Belgian Milk Chocolate and my parents split some other ingenuous flavors (Mom didn't care for black coffee but Dad and I loved it). I love walking around with Mom when there is so much to see - she is a great companion for discovering new things - if ever I go an another adventure, I'm bringing her. She and I took a picture next to a beautiful array of flower displays and my Dad and I took a picture in front of some vegetables with me 'biting' into an apple he was holding. What a trip. We ended up coming back to my place and saw 'Spanglish' (my Dad's pick, might I add). I dozed off while laying in between the two people who I feel safest with.
We had reservations at this eclectic German Village restaurant called Barcelona. We split a nice bottle of Rioja and enjoyed some delicious tapas. And then commenced our deep talk of the night - I knew it was going to happen, it was just a matter of when and where. I enjoy a relationship with my parents that is based on open communication and deep respect for all parties involved. It isn't rare for my dad and I to spark up a conversation on the deep questions of life, theories and life experiences. I let them know that I have been exploring options for study abroad next winter quarter (from January to May) to Florence, Italy. My mom shared that she had found my blog and read it. I had a nervous feeling at first but then realized that I only wrote how I felt and I would not take any of it back. My mom admitted that she was saddened at parts - understandably. I welcome both of them to read what I have to say, they surely will get new insight.
I do have to say one thing: although my friends ARE my family, the member of my family ARE my friends. I am blessed to have the support I have from my parents, my sisters and my girlfriends. My family is a big one - I love everyone in it. In fact, I would not be where I am right now in my life without my Mom and Dad's steady guidance and support, Anne's constant friendship, Sofia's wise beyond her years advice, Jessi's compassion, Sadie's laughter, Andrea's tough love, Emily's quiet rebelliousness, Kelsey's goodness, Katie's realistic outlook and all of their love. Each one of you adds to who I am. I am lucky. If so many people believe in me, there is no way I am letting them down. And so, I have found a renewed sense of purpose. I am capable and meant for great things. I look forward to growing and experiencing with my family - I have so much more to live.
It is absolutely insane how fast January went - and it's crazy that we are in the 5th week of the quarter - MIDPOINT.
It's always good to self examine in the middle of things so that's what I have been doing this weekend. My parents came up yesterday to spend the day with me - I had been anxiously waiting for their visit ever since they told me - for a week and a half. My parents visiting me is a big deal. Not only do I absolutely love spending time with them - It means so much more that they take the effort to drive up early and leave late. It's nice to relax with them away from our usual home atmosphere. Yesterday was especially nice. We went to North Market (Columbus' indoor Findlay market) and we ate Sarefino's calzones. My dad was like a little boy in a candy shop when he realized they sold Cream Soda - he kept calling it Cream Cheese. My mom, being the resourceful considerate woman that she is, snuck off while we ordered and bought us a chocolate croissant for dessert - it was a very nice gesture. Splitting the croissant got all three of us reminiscing about our past European travels...
We walked around the market enmeshed with cheerleaders, Christian youth group members and Anime die-hards (all three had conventions going on). We stopped by Jenni's icecream for another treat where I got black coffee and Belgian Milk Chocolate and my parents split some other ingenuous flavors (Mom didn't care for black coffee but Dad and I loved it). I love walking around with Mom when there is so much to see - she is a great companion for discovering new things - if ever I go an another adventure, I'm bringing her. She and I took a picture next to a beautiful array of flower displays and my Dad and I took a picture in front of some vegetables with me 'biting' into an apple he was holding. What a trip. We ended up coming back to my place and saw 'Spanglish' (my Dad's pick, might I add). I dozed off while laying in between the two people who I feel safest with.
We had reservations at this eclectic German Village restaurant called Barcelona. We split a nice bottle of Rioja and enjoyed some delicious tapas. And then commenced our deep talk of the night - I knew it was going to happen, it was just a matter of when and where. I enjoy a relationship with my parents that is based on open communication and deep respect for all parties involved. It isn't rare for my dad and I to spark up a conversation on the deep questions of life, theories and life experiences. I let them know that I have been exploring options for study abroad next winter quarter (from January to May) to Florence, Italy. My mom shared that she had found my blog and read it. I had a nervous feeling at first but then realized that I only wrote how I felt and I would not take any of it back. My mom admitted that she was saddened at parts - understandably. I welcome both of them to read what I have to say, they surely will get new insight.
I do have to say one thing: although my friends ARE my family, the member of my family ARE my friends. I am blessed to have the support I have from my parents, my sisters and my girlfriends. My family is a big one - I love everyone in it. In fact, I would not be where I am right now in my life without my Mom and Dad's steady guidance and support, Anne's constant friendship, Sofia's wise beyond her years advice, Jessi's compassion, Sadie's laughter, Andrea's tough love, Emily's quiet rebelliousness, Kelsey's goodness, Katie's realistic outlook and all of their love. Each one of you adds to who I am. I am lucky. If so many people believe in me, there is no way I am letting them down. And so, I have found a renewed sense of purpose. I am capable and meant for great things. I look forward to growing and experiencing with my family - I have so much more to live.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Do the dance...
Ok, I have not updated for a week...
I saw GirlTalk in concert on Saturday - the vibe was crazy insane. Everyone was out of control dancing all over the place; I loved it. I was definitely not expecting GirlTalk to be some skinny white guy with a big attitude - it just made him more awesome. I had some genuine fun that night - and I think it was because I was trying to let off some steam from my trip to Cincinnati.
I went home Thursday night for a dentist appointment Friday morning hoping to just relax a little with my mom and dad and my sisters. I had been nonstop since early Thursday morning so I was a little irritated when I got a call from Sofia on my way down. She was hysterical. Shit went down at dinner supposedly with her and my mom. I always feel like I am the one who needs to fix things like this when they happen - and they happen all the damn time. I was able to think and clear things up in my head the rest of the way down. Once I got into my house and after seeing my parents bloodshot eyes my heart dropped. Sometimes, I feel like my family is falling a part. Needless to say, I did not have fun and I was not able to relax at all. I think I may be the only one who can see how serious we are deteriorating as a family. Everyone is so involved in their lives that they can't see how bad it is. I didn't call you because the drama was nonstop and I needed to be home. I left Saturday morning to Sofia yelling and berating my mom and my mom silently crying.
So, it isn't surprising that I had fun Saturday night - I drank myself to oblivion.
I applied to three more jobs today. that would make a total of 6 places I have applied to. I hope something comes out of it. With the day off, I plan to get caught up with homework.
I will miss you. You leave tomorrow?!
I'm taking an Italian Renaissance class which has renewed my passion for Italian history and Florence, in particular, hence the picture. I would be happy forever if I resided in Florence. I know I want to go back.
this week:
#1: find a job, set up interview, do whatever i have to do to take the next step
#2: forget about family life for a bit - need to focus on me.
I saw GirlTalk in concert on Saturday - the vibe was crazy insane. Everyone was out of control dancing all over the place; I loved it. I was definitely not expecting GirlTalk to be some skinny white guy with a big attitude - it just made him more awesome. I had some genuine fun that night - and I think it was because I was trying to let off some steam from my trip to Cincinnati.
I went home Thursday night for a dentist appointment Friday morning hoping to just relax a little with my mom and dad and my sisters. I had been nonstop since early Thursday morning so I was a little irritated when I got a call from Sofia on my way down. She was hysterical. Shit went down at dinner supposedly with her and my mom. I always feel like I am the one who needs to fix things like this when they happen - and they happen all the damn time. I was able to think and clear things up in my head the rest of the way down. Once I got into my house and after seeing my parents bloodshot eyes my heart dropped. Sometimes, I feel like my family is falling a part. Needless to say, I did not have fun and I was not able to relax at all. I think I may be the only one who can see how serious we are deteriorating as a family. Everyone is so involved in their lives that they can't see how bad it is. I didn't call you because the drama was nonstop and I needed to be home. I left Saturday morning to Sofia yelling and berating my mom and my mom silently crying.
So, it isn't surprising that I had fun Saturday night - I drank myself to oblivion.
I applied to three more jobs today. that would make a total of 6 places I have applied to. I hope something comes out of it. With the day off, I plan to get caught up with homework.
I will miss you. You leave tomorrow?!
I'm taking an Italian Renaissance class which has renewed my passion for Italian history and Florence, in particular, hence the picture. I would be happy forever if I resided in Florence. I know I want to go back.
this week:
#1: find a job, set up interview, do whatever i have to do to take the next step
#2: forget about family life for a bit - need to focus on me.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
The start of something new...kind of.
Welcome to The Chronicles of Natalia where I, Natalie, will reveal all of the exciting and spontaneous events that happen in my life. Perhaps it would be safer to say that my days will be recorded, but I cannot promise excitement or spontaneity...
I am Natalie. I am young but getting older. My friends are my family. Money is hard to come by and life is moving fast...maybe a little too fast. Challenge #1: Slow down and write more. reflect.
which leads to Challenge #2: Figure out what I want...
More to come.
I am Natalie. I am young but getting older. My friends are my family. Money is hard to come by and life is moving fast...maybe a little too fast. Challenge #1: Slow down and write more. reflect.
which leads to Challenge #2: Figure out what I want...
More to come.
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